Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
What if Egyptians actually had a written language, then started using emojis, and that’s all that’s left?
Working from home means I save money on train tickets and pants, but spend more on vodka and pizza.
I`m 28 years old, but in marriage years, I`m dead on the inside.
Happy July 22nd! Today isn’t a holiday, but you’re alive and well, so why not celebrate?
Girl: What color are my eyes? Guy: 34C
Shopping for bridesmaid dresses with 5 other women, today. If you never hear from me again, I committed suicide by nail file.
Whenever I weigh myself, I always subtract 10 pounds. I don`t think boobs, brains, and an ass this fabulous should count against me.
Do people with cats not know about dogs?
If anybody out there happens to have my voodoo doll, can u please scratch my balls. I happe to be in a public place at the moment.
I`ve officially met everyone`s mother yesterday via Facebook so I`m pretty sure that takes me out of the friend zone here ladies
A good way to mess with a jogger is to run up along side them and say "I think we lost them."
I like when people call me "Sir". I just wish they wouldn`t follow it up with "you`re making a scene."
The next person that tells me I have no shame…probably knows me pretty darn well.
The problem with coffee is trying to make it when you haven`t had any yet.
If you never jumped from sofa to sofa as a kid to avoid the lava, then you missed out on childhood.