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In Store Special - "You`re My One and Only" Valentine`s Day cards... 4 for $5...
I force my dog to watch animal abuse commercials just to show him how good he has it.
I hope I never have to run for my life. It wouldn’t end well.
Spilling a full beer you paid for is the adult equivalent of letting go of a balloon.
My wife even says "NO" in her sleep. The force is strong with this one.
To say I wasted today would be a huge insult to the producers of the 3 movies I watched.
You know you`re getting old when cops make you feel safe instead of nervous.
had a great time horseback riding today but then I ran out of quarters
If you can’t be a good example, then you’l just have to serve as a horrible warning
I always like seeing those "Baby on Board" stickers because it`s nice to see agreeable babies out there.
Just saw the first duckface of Spring.
I`m that friend you have to explain to people before you introduce me... And apologize for after.
U have 10 fish, 5 drown, 3 come back to life. how many fish do you have?? stop counting smart one fish can`t drown
All I need right now is a hug ... And five hundred thousand dollars in cash.
is wondering if the hokey pokey is really what it´s all about