Daily Silly Status

I can`t tell them apart, was that Milli or Vanilli doing the sign language at Madela`s funeral?

Is it called NASCAR because that’s the way a hillbilly pronounces “nice car?”

Everybody stop what you`re doing and play with crayons!! Enjoy the day

All I`m saying is, China could have a much better relationship with the West if they shared their dragons with us. But, whatever, be that way.

My wife let me remove all her clothes last night ... From the dryer

Lady: what Colour are my eyes? Man: 34D

Stop complaining about being single on Valentine`s Day. We have bigger problems in this world. Like why McDonald`s doesn`t serve breakfast after 10.30

If your girl sets her Facebook relationship status to “Widowed”, it’s time to pack a suitcase as fast as possible.

My girlfriend left a note on the fridge, "It`s not working. I cant take it anymore, I`m going to moms" I opened the fridge, the light came on, the beer was cold, WTF is she talking about?

So I harvested my tomato today, it`s bound to be good considering the $43.29 I invested to plant it.

I just found out that all the people who say "You haven`t changed a bit" have been lying to me. :)

Do homeless people get Knock Knock Jokes?

I’m always in a rush to get home so I can do absolutely nothing.

All this time I thought Bi-Polar was big white bear with no sexual preference.

Hysterical Shrieking should be reserved for truly serious situations such as Centipedes, Spiders, and that Creepy Uncle that likes to give everyone back rubs.....