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Not sure if this Adderall is working but I just made a pros and cons list about pros and cons lists.
Sometimes I wish I could appear offline in real life too
Sometimes, in life, all you really need is a lot of money.
This town is about as exciting as watching an M&M melt in the sun.
MY 8 YEAR OLD: "Walrus testicles are called walnuts."
I`ve got my wise-ass in my smartypants so I`m ready for anything!
In grade school it’s called bullying but when you get older it’s referred to as upper level management.
Marriage lets you annoy one special person for the rest of your life.
Yet another advantage of being single. All I bring to Thanksgiving is empty Tupperware...
I`d probably get a lot more done if it wasn`t for me.
Y`all are gonna lose your minds when Donald Trump eats a Snickers and turns into Bernie Sanders.
The key to my heart is shaped like a bottle opener.
I`m reaching the point where I really hope it`s not possible to be annoyed to death.
Sorry I poked you all over your body, but I was just looking for the off button.
I`m trying to be healthy and grow my own food but I can`t find any Twinkie seeds.