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I support recycling, I wore this shirt yesterday.
I BRIEFLY had an urge to clean ... but that lasted only 5 minutes .. whew! That was close! Lol
is frickin awesome! Nough Said.
There’s no question about it, the second half of the tank of gas goes twice as fast as the first!
I saw a fat lady with a "M.O.B." tattoo on her arm. I asked "money over B*tches?" She said "No, McDonalds over Burger King.
Keep your marriage fresh by writing each other love notes like "I considered smothering you with a pillow last night but didn`t."
Why do they write PIZZA all over the box? What else could possibly be in there???
You haven`t really made it until people start using your name as a verb.
May be time to get in shape. Halfway up this flight of stairs and I`m considering setting up base camp and trying again in the morning.
I`m reading a book on anti-gravity. It is impossible to put down.
Do they have to play movies so loud at the theatre? I litterally have to scream into my phone.
Girl:How do u feel? Boy:With your hands
This might be the worst online counseling site ever.
If it was not for electricity, we would all be watching T.V. by candle light.
B is the best letter of the alphabet: Boobs, Buns, Booty, Booze, Beer, Bourbon, and Bacon.