Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I shouldn`t have to work. People should just pay me for being awesome.
Change of plans everyone: NOBODY Wang Chung tonight.
I learn from the mistakes of people who took my advice.
I miss newspapers. It`s weird hitting a dog on the nose with an iPad
Relationship status: I make my own sandwiches.
It`s not so much that I have to work that bothers me...oh wait, yes it is.
The best black Friday deal ... sleep - $0.
I sure do feel a whole lot more attractive at WalMart than I do at the gym.
Here’s a joke for all you mind readers out there…
I can`t go to sleep if any of my apps need to be updated, but will drive my car with the check engine light until it explodes.
I painted a banner for our annual family picnic, but my Mom thought "Celebrating 100 Years of Undiagnosed Mental Illness" was inappropriate.
Expect nothing and you`ll be impressed every day.
Hangovers are nature`s way of grounding you as an adult.
Don`t cry because it`s over, smile because you were able to steal 12 of his hoodies.
I’m not crazy just the voices are!