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The pill is the second best thing women can put in their mouths to prevent pregnancy.
What happens in Vegas never happens to me.
Iām trusting a whole lot of people not to randomly murder me throughout the day.
It is totAlly unnecessary to put a PM after 23:00.
There`s no b, c, d, f, g, h, j, k, l, n, o, p, q, r, s, u, v, w, x, y, or z in team either.
Thank you Lord for this delicious meal we are about to Instagram.
Christmas spirit? I`m proud to say I`ve got plenty of that. I`ve got rum, whiskey, gin, brandy, vodka and tequila.
I`m concerned my kids will end up in therapy because I didn`t tell everyone on FB how much I love them.
You don`t know laziness until you rob a bank & choose to wait for the amount you stole to be announced on news rather than count it yourself
I sure did waste a lot of time as a kid practicing my autograph.
You`re the one who wore a red and yellow scarf to class. So don`t look at me weird for shouting "10 points for gryffindor" when you answer questions cause I know you wanted this. -Bfanch
Does running away from your problems count as exercising? If it is, then I`m one hell of a fitness freak
Dude, I see you are enjoying a cold Bud Light Lime-a-Rita .... I`m going to assume that`s your smart car parked outside.
I want to take this moment to thank the depends adult diaper company for allowing me to play my video game for a strait 8 hours uninterupted...
I once met a guy who was addicted to huffing brake fluid. He said he could stop any time.