Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I`m having fruit salad for dinner, well, it`s mostly grapes...crushed grapes ...ok, it`s wine, I`m having wine!
Sometimes getting unfriended on Facebook is magical....really....it`s like the trash took itself out.
When people with multiple personality disorders are about to die, whose life flashes before their eyes?
The easiest way to keep a secret is without help
Girls are like roads, the more curves, the more dangerous they are.
If you`re in your car, go ahead and pick your nose, because the car makes you invisible.
I don`t get why he counts the beer before he leaves to work... There`s never any left when he comes home.
My job description does not include farting on everyone else`s office chairs but I still do it because INITIATIVE.
Ferris Bueller did more in one day than I’ve done in my entire life.
You only live once is the most reassuring thing I`ve ever heard.
People think I`m crazy because I talk to my cat. What am I supposed to do? Just ignore him when he asks me a question?
Just found out my birthday is the same day I was born... Life is crazy...
It’s been “one of those days” for like 3 years now.
have you ever looked at someone and thought, "yeah you definitely have someone locked away in your basement."
Hope dogs are kissing us and not trying to see if we started tasting good yet.