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Hair pulling during sex is hot ... unless the whole wig comes off.
I`m not really your friend until I start insulting you on a daily basis.
Had a blast doing my Black Friday tradition!!!! I slept!
If you think your wife has a great sense of humor, try leaving a trail of rose petals leading to a sink full of dirty dishes. Not the best idea a man ever had ;)
Hit me with your pet shark #RuinAn80sSong
"Mary had a little lamb. That`s had." - the wolf
Before Walmart, you had to buy a ticket to the fair to see a bearded woman.
Not sure what my spirit animal is, but I am sure it has rabies
I`m not necessarily saying that I am or am not a super hero, but I do occasionally stand with my hands on my hips.
Gotta admire people who drive with one hand holding on to a mattress tied to the roof.
Today I saw something that reminded me of you. But don`t worry, I flushed and everything went back to normal.
If someone doesn`t respond to your text within 5 minutes, they obviously don`t love you anymore. Probably never did, react accordingly.
when people fall in love they are called " love birds." when they fight they are called "angry birds."
wishes that more people would declare thumb wars these days. I`m sure that all this texting has prepared my thumb muscles for battle.
Facebook ~ redefining "friendship" one booby pic at a time. ;)