Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I’m beginning to believe that successful relationships come down to Netflix compatibility.
It`s getting warm out. I can finally get back to smacking people and blaming it on mosquitos!
You think you are too small to make a difference? then you have never spent a single night with a mosquito.
I`m confused, oh wait, maybe I`m not.
I was on way home this morning when I seen an AA van pulled in and the driver was crying his eyes out. I thought to myself that guy is heading for a breakdown.
The first snow of spring is always the most beautiful
If a door closes in your life...kick that f*cking thing open and continue to pursue your dreams.
My favorite part about your rant on how much you hate social media sites was when you posted it from a social media site.
just keep scrolling nothing to see hear
Why does no one ever talk about where a bear pees?
The realization that Netflix knows me better than my closest friends....
I`m so glad my face doesn’t have a progress bar that shows how long it takes me to understand what someone is saying.
Ladies...when I say bless you after a sneeze, just say Thank you, instead of wondering where in the bushes that just came from.
This movie has "adult content"? So, they`re gonna complain about back pains and setting up a 401k?
Yawning is the body`s way of saying `10% Battery Remaining`.