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I`m definitely the drunkest person in this ball pit.
At work hitting the escape key...... Nothing is happening, im still here.
I`m convinced some people got married just so they could gripe about being married...
the only correct answer to are u ticklish? is i have explosive diareha right now
Sometimes late at night.. I dig a hole in the back yard by lantern light.. Sure keeps my nosy neighbors on their toes.. :|
If all men are created equal then why are there midgets?
I could write an entire book on excuses,,, but I have to pick my grandma up at the airport.
I remember 2012 like it was yesterday.
You know when you’re exercising and feel like you could keep going and going? That’s happening to me, only with beer.
Ahhh, the 4th of July. The day where trips to hospital start with the words "Hold my beer and watch this!"
For a generation that allowed YOLO, BAE, and KIM KARDASHIAN to happen, you sure have a lot of f*cking opinions on how things should be run.
I was enjoying our conversation. Until you started talking....
Its all fun and games until someone drinks the beer with the cigarette butts in it..
My friend bought some new floral underwear today. I asked her why she bought `floral` underwear to which she replied "its in memory of all the faces that have been buried there".
Ever wish the choice you made and the “right thing to do” were the same thing?