Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Apparently getting injured while in the KISS Army doesn`t make you eligible for V.A. benefits.
What idiot called it the sun instead of a space heater?
Please don`t wear skinny jeans if you don`t have skinny genes.
At first it was "Okay" and then "ok" and now "k" and soon it will disappear and you`ll all regret it
My parents say its their house, but when its time to clean it magically becomes my house too.
Nipples (noun) - the body`s way of telling you the weather
Can we just stop with the pre-sliced cheese? Is anyone so busy that they don’t have time to cut the cheese?
If you don’t feel just a little bit of shame after the weekend… you’re not doing it right.
You know you`re married when you find her sexier with clothes on.
For Christmas I just want summer...
I`m hoping to avoid a situation where I have to dance to save my own life.
who`s smart idea wus it to name a monkey Donkey Kong??
I`ve accidentally swallowed a load of scrabble pieces.........My next poop could spell trouble.
This spider just got away from me because I made the classic villain mistake of telling him my whole evil plan before killing him.
If you kept one of those jars where I`d have to put in a quarter every time I swore, you would be a billionaire by the end of the week.