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the dude who posted ”MERRY CHRISTMAS“ has still got his head shoved up the turkeys A$$ it seems...
My internet addiction is getting alt of ctl.
I`m really good at using the turkey baster as a sword and getting drunk and not being invited to Thanksgiving anymore.
if you hold a dinner fork really close to your eyes, you can pretend that they`re in jail
Pretend it`s a beer... Pretend it`s a beer... Pretend it`s a beer... - Me trying not to drop a baby.
so, on a scale of one is to seven, which letter of the alphebet is your favourite colour?
Why isn’t our beer color coordinated for all holiday occasions, instead of just St. Patricks Day?
When I`m bored I like to call in sick to places I don`t work for. I`m getting written up at Kohls.
Life before the computer: Memory was something that you lost with age. An application was for employment. A program was a TV show. A cursor used profanity. A keyboard was a piano. A web was a spider’s home. A virus was the flu. A CD was a bank account. A hard drive was a long trip on the road. A mouse pad was where a mouse lived. And if you had a 3 1/2 inch floppy…you just hoped nobody found out.
I would rather lie there and accept death than try to get out of a hammock while anyone is watching me.
There are 364 days till Christmas and people already have their Christmas lights up. Unbelievable.
Curious that it`s always a female computer voice that calmly announces self-destruct sequences and other violent disasters.
How to Train Your Dragon offers no practical dragon training information. NONE. Zero stars.
Don`t ask me what I did today, neither of us want to hear it out loud.
I have good taste, I just don`t have the money to prove it.