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" I don`t watch much tv" proudly says a person who spend 8 hours a day on the internet.
Some people are training as complainers like it is a competitive sport
A leaf blower, but for people.
How many HA’s equal a LOL? How about a LMAO? Is there a conversion chart somewhere?
Sociologists say that social media is creating the laziest generation ever. I expressed my opinion in great detail by hitting the “Like” button.
Life is short, break the rules, forgive quickly, kiss slowly, love truly, laugh uncontrollably and never regret anything that made you smile ?
Spiderman`s Spidey sense is just really spot on anxiety.
The letters T and G are very close to each other on a keyboard. This recently became all too apparent to me and consequently I will never be ending a work email with the phrase Regards again.
If it wasn’t for profanity, I wouldn’t be a pro at anything.
Judging by the amount of times I accidently cut myself on sharp objects it`s probably just as well real lightsabers aren`t available yet.
“we should hang out soon” loosely translates to I’m doing everything in my power to end this stupid conversation.
If my fridge had glass doors I would still stand there and hold the door open.
Asian gangs, also known as study groups...
I assume when I get put on hold after I call customer service, it`s because 2 guys are flipping a coin to see who pretends to be the manager.
A girl who lives hundreds of miles away texting you “I’m drunk” is like a lasagna texting you from Italy saying “I’m delicious”