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I would like to remind everyone it`s not the size of the boat... Or the motion of the ocean, but the whether the boat is able to stay in port until all passangers have gotten off.
If you got up this morning and ran straight to fb i am 100% POSITIVE its because you missed me.
I think most of my friends hang out with me to see what I’ll say next.
If I wasn`t supposed to have vodka for breakfast they shouldn`t have made it taste so good with orange juice.
Don`t threaten to leave people, surprise them by actually leaving.
Pokémon means a totally different thing if your stuck in a Jamaican prison.
I wonder what its like to fart in zero gravity. Does it like...propel you forward? These are things people need to know NASA
Why do guys cheat on pretty girls with ugly ones...?
a walk in the woods helps me to relax and release tension the fact that I`m dragging a body behind me should be irrelevant.
The trouble with jogging is, that by the time you realize you`re not in shape, it`s too far to walk back.
Sometimes, I`m offended at how easily offended some people get.
Is running in front of cars some sort of gang initiation for squirrels? - Bfanch
Why is it always the same person getting in your way from start to checkout at the grocery store?
Arm wrestling is DEFINITELY the manliest sport where Two dudes hold hands...
Dropped my son off for his first day of kindergarten today. Does anybody know what age you`re supposed to pick them up?