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Organized people are just too lazy to look for things!
?-- that guy is cute ?
I wonder if more children were conceived because of alcohol or more alcohol was consumed because of children.
Boys are like roses, watch out for the pr!cks...
Video games don`t encourage violence nearly as much as piñatas do.
Sometimes I post crazy shit just to see if my friend`s list will drop a few #`s
I ran into a dwarfs car this morning and he come up to me and said "I`m not happy!" And I said we`ll which one are you then
Definition of insanity - Doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results
According to my current parking spot, I`m Chief of Police.
Sometimes I meet people and feel sorry for their dog.
My coworkers are looking at me like they`ve never seen anyone tailgate before work.
I did a terrible job preparing for my Blue Man Group audition and boy is my face red
People with no money sure do have a lot of pot.
Burglars must love "My Family Stickers". They can wait in front of someone`s house, count the people that leave, and know if they have a dog or not...
No one texts faster than a gossiping woman.