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Honestly, I have no idea what the f*ck I`ll do with 5 hours of energy.
Today is different because after you lie to someone, you tell them you were lying.
Once your pants catch fire, the fact that you`re lying becomes less important.
Coffee is nature’s way of saying “Go ahead, get drunk on a weeknight, I got your back!”
Just Failed my Health and Saftey Test.The question was,"What steps would u take,in case of a fire?!"Big f*cking ones"was the wrong answer.
Is life fair? Short answer, no. Long answer, nooooooo.
Whenever our neighbor`s dog is barking, I know there`s either someone at their door or literally anything else in the universe has happened.
Is there a phobia for leaving the house when your phone isn`t fully charged? There should be.
Not sure what my spirit animal is, but I am sure it has rabies
The new Jungle Book movie might be confusing to today`s kids who don`t remember when we had jungles. Or books...
It`s a lot easier to chuck a co-worker in the dumpster than it is to listen to his problems.
I`m so lonely that my cat owns a cat.
is procastinating now. Don´t see why I should put it off.
Sometimes my mind wanders, other times it leaves completly. ;)
My mum`s so old fashioned she thinks LOL = Lots of love. She sent me an SMS saying just to let you know you`re Pa`s in hospital LOL.