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Since you were smiling when you tazed me, I`m guessing we still have a chance.
Benefits of dating me: 1. You`re the smart one
It must be hard to judge a wet t-shirt contest. I saw one recently and all the t-shirts looked equally wet.
I hate the snow so much, I want to build a snowman just so I can punch it in its face.
When I`m bored I like to call in sick to places I don`t work for. I`m getting written up at Home Depot
Nothing is quite so annoying as to have someone go right on talking when you`re interrupting!
Australian kiss. It`s kind of like a French kiss, but down under.
I once overdosed on Viagra. My wife took it really hard.
Legally, it`s questionable .. Morally, it`s disgusting .. Personally, I love it. ;)
Trust me , as you get to know me , i just get weirder.
I need to start setting an alarm to go to bed.
To a musician, a g-string means something completely different than it does to me. .
Due to the rising cost of ammunition I will no longer be able to provide a warning shot. Thanks for your understanding.
In my day we had to roll the windows up and down with our bare hands.
Do you ever get the feeling that you`re being watched? Because if it`s bothering you, I`ll stop.