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How come know-it-alls, don`t know how annoying they are?
As a kid, i was afraid of the dark. Now as an adult, I love the dark because I am terrified of the electrical bill.
so I got really drunk last night, but I was good and took a bus home. the only problem I have now is I dont remember where I put the keys to the bus.
There’s no question about it, the second half of the tank of gas goes twice as fast as the first!
I`m curious: Do girls shake the gasoline nozzle when they`re taking it out of their cars too?
I think today I`ll stalk my stalker, just to shake things up a little.
Do you remember that creepy guy who stood behind you on a train 6 years ago and was smelling your hair? Hi!
I love that moment when I`m cruising down the highway listening to country music and I suddenly realize "wait a minute I can change the station!"
How to tell if your wife is mad at you - Step 1. She is
I`ve never done any mistake twice... three, four times may be!
My favorite holiday spirit is poured over ice.
I spend hours on Facebook and then think, “Well, that was pointless”
“I’m not washing it, I’m just gonna shove it in a pony.” If you’re a girl, that sentence is actually ok.
Men also have feelings. For example, we can feel hungry
Back in the day, Mom gave us two dinner choices. What she cooked or jack sh!t....