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To the people that post 15 pics of your kid everyday,your kid looks EXACTLY the same as they did ystrdy,and the day before,and the day before that
Oh and BTW,,, Why haven`t Pig Pen`s parents been visited by child services yet?
Well, one week smoke free, only 4 dead, 27 injured… not bad…
Has anyone EVER checked to see how the room or wall behind them looks before taking and posting 50 selfies?!
They should put Prince on the $20 bill and call it $19.99... It`s "The bill formerly known as a twenty."
When one door closes, another one opens.... That`s when you realize that you`ve bought a really bad second hand car.
If I gave you a penny for your thoughts I`d totally be expecting some change back.
I got a letter in the mail saying I was pre-approved for a Walmart Credit Card. Not sure if I should be honored or ashamed.
My favorite beer is an open one.
I`m tough and can take whatever life throws at me ... Especially if its dipped in chocolate first.
Like a good neighbor, strip clubs are there
Kissing a sleeping woman in an animated Disney movie is romantic but do it on a bus and the judge doesn`t agree.
My home security system is just 15 motion-activated Big Mouth Billy Basses.
Elevators are so stupid. They have a button for the floor I`m already on.
It must be exhausting being offended by everything.