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What idiot called it the sun instead of a space heater?
Why don’t television shows say, “You will be delighted to know that this program contains strong sexual content?”
Either I need to up my dosage or my income.
Why do they waste so much money on all the checkout lanes at Walmart, when they only have two of them open at any given time.
List of the most populated places in the world - 1. China 2. India 3. Friend Zone 4. United States 5. Indonesia
I retired from being my brothers keeper when I realised that I was letting in goals that wouldn`t have scored if his post was empty
It’s funny that old people need handicap parking spots but they always manage to pick up a penny off the ground.
My dog reacts to the vacuum cleaner the same way I react when my wife says "We need to talk".
What is this `wrong hole` you people speak of?
The wet spot in my bed is tears
Sometimes the only reason I leave my house is so when someone asks about my day I don’t have to say “Netflix and avoiding responsibilities"
Hugh Hefner dead at age 91. With the amount of Viagra that guy must have been taking, good luck closing that casket lid.
??q? uo p??oq??? ? ?nq i ??i? ?s?? ??? si si??
Once a month, women go completely crazy for about thirty days..
So long pants! See you Monday!