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I`m not sure what post it was that caused me to lose 2 more Facebook friends today, but if I find out which one it was I will make sure to post it again....
There is a fine line between “hobby” and “mental illness.”
Buying new Nikes, call that soul searching
i feel naked without my mobile !
My wife said we could have a three way "when pigs fly" so I showed her a police helicopter.
I`m not an alcoholic I just have a lot of things to celebrate.
The bouncer at the club calls me Kevin McAllister because I`m always going home alone
That awkward moment when you’re laughing so hard, you accidentally hit your head on something..
Every day I struggle between “I wanna look good naked” and “treat yourself.”
Judging by all of the cologne and shower sets I got for Christmas either people know I like to smell good or I am failing at it.
Is it bad when I´m talking to myself and I´m not even listening?
You don’t truly know someone until you see how they react to their bag of chips getting stuck in a vending machine.
I like to reward myself for getting up on time by laying in bed for another 20 minutes.
Don`t talk about yourself so much... we`ll do that when you leave.
Me: I`m hungry. Fridge: I don`t give a sh*t. Cabinet: B*tch, don`t look at me. Freezer: Lol, you like ice? :-)