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" a fool and his money ----- are never around when you need a loan......"
My salad pic. got more likes than your selfie.
Whenever I open my fridge, my dog looks at me with a puzzled look and he thinks, “why don’t you eat all the food?”
I do procrastinate more than I should, but it always gives me something to do tomorrow...
If there`s one thing I`ve learned, it`s that I should have learned some other stuff.
Celery is 95% water and 100% not pizza
There has to be an online course that I can take to get over my internet addiction.
I spend the first half of work fantasizing about all the different places I could go for lunch.
It was so cold that when we milk the cows we got ice cream.
Facebook should just change it`s name to "People You May Want to Avoid."
I never wanted to grow up, I just wanted to be tall enough to reach the cookies.
I don’t call it laying down anymore, I call it landscape mode.
The amount of time my smartphone spends plugged in charging, you might as well want to call it a Land-line
I don`t get in trouble, I just get into questionable situations.
I`m thinking of making a sax tape to make myself well known like some of the bad boys and girls do...does it matter if I can`t play it?