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Insert coin to view my status message.
You, my friend, deserve a high-five... that’s four more fingers than I normally give.
You can learn a lot about a woman by watching her load a gun.
I have learned that pleasing everyone is impossible…but pissing everyone off is easy and fun as hell!
is wondering why Facebook bothers to give the option of "liking" my own comment? Of course I like my own comments. I´m awesome..
Everyone has a purpose in life ... Perhaps mine is finding things to bitch about.
It`s bigger on the inside..said no woman, ever!
Talk to me long enough and you`ll realize why I`m single.
Jellyfish have survived here on Earth for 650 million years without brains. Great news for most of you.
If you were born after 1990, you will never know the frustration of having to rewind your parents porn tapes to the exact same spot...
If you feel bad because you didn’t do well on a final, just remember someone from your hometown is still trying to become a rapper.
Ever since I installed AdBlock, all the single ladies in my area seemed to have lost interest.
If you didn`t want me looking in your bedroom than you never should have put your window at the same height as my ladder.
Maybe don`t show me a picture if you don`t want me to rate your baby.
Did you know that if we laid all the facebook account owners end to end around the world. Three quarters of them would Drown? Hmm ....