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My mother was feeling cold so now I`m wearing a sweater.
This is a private status. Please don`t tell anyone about it.
Hiding from people at parties is my cardio.
I consider anything that doesn`t fit in the dishwasher to be for one time use.
Legos are practice for when you get older & buy Ikea furniture
Of course I`m a good mother ... They`re still alive aren`t they.
My wife keeps leaving magazines lying around with the jewelry ads circled. I got the hint. For Valentine`s Day she’s getting a magazine rack
If Violets were Orange, poetry would be a lot more challenging.
You’re not yourself today. I noticed the improvement immediately.
Just once I`d like to see a stripper do the "Carlton" on stage.
They say you are what you eat. I don`t remember eating a sexy beast this morning...
I wanna be rich enough to have 11 little people who run out of my closet every morning dressed as a nascar pit crew to make my bed really fast.
Being human is expensive and exhausting.
Creativity is great, but plagiarism is faster.
if sexyness, kindness, sweetness was a crime, You would be the world`s most wanted