Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
A baby`s laughter is one of the most beautiful sounds you will ever hear, Unless it`s 3am. And you don`t have a baby, And you`re home alone.
If we can have HD video from Mars,,, then I should have 4 bars on my phone everywhere I go.
Some people are like clouds. When they disappear, it’s a brighter day.
I’m probably single because I forgot to forward those chain messages from 2008.
Roses are red, dead ones are black, why is your chest as flat as your back?
“Was that lightning?” “No no…. they’re taking pictures for Google Earth..”
Wisdom for the day is , hot cheetos are not breakfast.
There is no angry way to say `bubbles.`
It`s such a cold winter this year that the squirrels are collecting more nuts than usual. So far 3 of my neighbors have disappeared...
Life hack: You can park wherever you want if you put your hazard lights on and take your tire off.
An empty fridge is a sad fridge.
So does screaming at my son in Chuck E. Cheese because he won`t share his game tokens with me make me an evil person? Just kidding! I have no clue whose kid this is.
The “Slow Children Playing” signs always make me sad. Would it cost that much more to thrown in punctuation?
Either I wrote a bunch of drunken Facebook status updates last night, or my dog has finally figured out the computer.
Not a day goes by when I don`t try to use The Force.