Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Beer and a 44 magnum with an everclear shot makes everything good like Nintendo
I`ve eaten enough chinese food in my day that my fortune cookies have started to contradict one another
Remember kids, the Toys R Us bankruptcy and liquidation teaches us that poor spelling and grammar will always catch up with you eventually.
What`s the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller" ?
Sugar` is the only word in English that starts with `su` and sounds like `sh`. I`m sure of it.
Dont piss me off...I`ll give your number to all the kids and tell them it`s Santa`s hot line!
I realized I eat too much fast food so I decided I would start cooking for myself. Does anyone here know how to "mcnugget" a chicken?
The "best part of waking up" doesn`t even make sense.
Hurricanes, Fires,Tiger running loose ... Whoever is playing Jumanji needs to wrap it up
I miss newspapers. It`s weird hitting a dog on the nose with an iPad.
My fridge is so full of beer ... I`m going to have to drink my way back to the food or starve.
People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who really do.
If you need Facebook to remind you it`s your wife`s birthday, I hope you own a comfortable couch.
If you find a four-leaf clover it means you have entirely too much time on your hands.
Men wear the pants in the relationship but women control the zipper.