Daily Silly Status

If you look in the mirror and say "Taylor Swift" three times, she magically appears then breaks up with you. What do u know next? You`re a song!

I think its nice my vacuum cleaner has head lights. Just in case I wanna wake up in the middle of the night and clean in the dark, or wake up my dog making him think he’s getting hit by a

My friend works at a rubber dog poop factory. He`ll never get rich, but he makes doo.

this website used to be full of funny statuses. Then the 8-year olds came in.

I advise you...don`t mess with me, I know karate, kung fu,judo, tae kwon do, jujitsu, and 28 other dangerous words.

If I saw a ghost, I would not be scared. I`d be like "Sit your translucent a$$ down, I have a lot of questions!"

My inner child has a bottle of vodka in one hand, a whip in the other and a broken halo sticking out of her back pocket.

If you have really strong opinions on subjects that you know very little about... then Facebook just may be the perfect thing for you.

Blood moon, shooting stars....I gotta move to a safer galaxy

The girls who don’t get a rose on The Bachelor should automatically get a cat.

90% of adulthood is just deleting emails.

Jobs are like relationships. You have them, you cry about it. You don’t have them, you cry about it.

I love how television has redefined the word `marathon` to the exact opposite of physical exercise

You know it`s cold outside... when you step on dog poop and roll your ankle

I didn`t see anyone important today, so I`ll probably wear these same clothes tomorrow.