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I have an inferiority complex, but it`s not a very good one.
My therapist said that I needed to find healthier ways of expressing my anger. So I decided to jog home after setting fire to my ex`s car.
Running away does not help with the problems unless you are fat
Light travels faster than sound. That`s why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
Have you ever make fun of someone so much, you think you should thank them for all the good times you´ve had?
I guarantee there`s a pregnant teenager somewhere who thinks `Ebola` would be a lovely name for their child.
Whoever invented the 5 day work week and 2 day weekend can suck my a**!
Remember before the internet when all the people at the video store knew you watched porn alone on Saturday mornings
I wish I was a jedi, but mostly just so I didn`t have to bend over to pick up dog poop.
A three hour long movie adaptation of pages 74 and 75 of the Hobbit? Friggin count me in.
Cheer Up. Right now, somebody, somewhere, is thinking about you naked.
I love my six pack abs so much that I cover them with a layer of fat .
It`s funny how as you get older you relate more to the villains in Disney than the Princesses.
That awkward moment when you type your password where you should`ve typed your email, and your friend`s standing right there -___-
I`m not naughty ... I`m mischievously creative