Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I`m pretty sure some of you just drag your face across the keyboard and hit send.
A good man can make you feel sexy, strong, and able to take on the world ...Oh sorry ...That`s wine ...Wine does that.
It`s like my golf instructor thinks I`m mature enough to handle him talking about balls, and how to properly grip the club.
We`re all mature until someone pulls out bubble wrap.
I don’t understand why I cant lose weight. I thought dieting was a piece of cake.
Taking my wife to a wife swapping party tonight… Hoping to get a PS4 in return.
It`s a good idea to test your immune system from time to time by eating a gas station hot dog
Nascar would be so more entertaining if they threw banana peels and turtle shells.
If I would have known there would be a Facebook, I would have written “eff off forever” instead of “keep in touch” in your yearbook.
At what age is it appropriate to tell my friends that they`re imaginary?
I`m only materialistic when I shop at the liquor store.
When the machines rise up against the humans, just pray to your God that you`re nowhere near a dildo factory.
Life is hard ... It`s harder if you`re stupid.
Sometimes I wish people would just bring donuts to work instead of drama.
We think therefore we must be, but are we?