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Yes I`m still bitter about my name not being mentioned in "Mambo No. 5"
I try not to be rude, but some people make it hard work.
I`m not really much of a plumber, but I have laid some pipe before.
There really should be awards for getting out of bed.
Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
NO, I didn`t say you WERE stupid. I said, you ARE stupid. There is nothing past tense about it.
Some of us are basically unpaid Facebook interns.
Just read a book on quantum evolution. The idea is that quantum mechanics are involved in the process of evolution. I still say go to WalMart and then try to sell me on evolution....
My opinion of yoga pants varies depending on if I`m at the gym or if I`m at Wal-Mart
Proposing to a woman isn`t like choosing a life-long business partner. It`s more like hiring your own boss.
If you have a parrot and you don’t teach it to say,”Help, they’ve turned me into a parrot”, you are wasting everybody’s time.
If I was on drugs, this post would be amazing.
Disneyland. The world’s biggest people trap, built by a mouse.
If I was just learning English and you told me a sport called BOXING takes place in a SQUARE area called a RING, I`d probably give up.
My entire working knowledge of automotive repair is derived from the song "The Wheels on the Bus"