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Is going to bed! Hopefully the Cleaning Fairies will come and clean my house tonight! Wishful Dreaming i guess!
Cubic Zirconium`s slogan should be: Guys can fake it too!
Corduroy pillows?... They`re making headlines!....
Job interview: Please tell us why you’d love to work for us? ME: I need money :)
Basketball would be a lot more exciting if each team was allowed one bear.
So I was thinking... We should get drunk and make bad decisions.
"Mary had a little lamb. That`s had." - the wolf
I like to walk around the house naked. Until the cops chase me back inside.
I act like Pacman at parties. I walk around the room eating everything in site and avoiding everyone.
Sorry I said "Better you than me" when you showed me your baby.
i forgot how to put a status ... can anyone help me ?
Hello everyone. Look at your status, now back to mine, now back to yours, now back to mine. Sadly, yours isn’t mine. But if you stopped posting about other things and made this your status, yours could be like mine. Look down, back up. Where are you? You’re on Facebook, reading the status your status could be like.
you can´t drink all day if you don´t start in the morning
How is it that one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box for me to start a campfire?
Fun Prank: Put $1000 in an envelope and mail it to me.