Daily Silly Status

Trust me, you want me medicated!!

I´m not cheap, but I am on special this week

To me, the worst part of the prostate exam is when the doctor says, "Guess how many fingers."

So they say that having to much sex can cause memory loss, which is just a little something I seem to remember reading in a Rolling Stone magazine once on page 64 paragraphs 3 through 5 while sitting on a park bench October 14th 2002 at 3:46 p.m

When cleaning my house: 1% Cleaning 30% Complaining 69% Playing with stuffs that I just found.

You’re the reason I wake up everyday... Just kidding I have a job!!

I’m sorry I offended you with my common sense.

The party`s not over `till you smile for the mugshot

Do you think when Spider-Man gets stoned with Batman and the Hulk he sometimes thinks the spider on his chest is real and freaks out?

Screw doing situps...teddy bears don`t and everyone loves them.

DiGiorno should start delivering, just to screw with people.

If at first you don’t succeed, you shouldn’t diffuse bombs.

I was really pissed at my girlfriend for not calling me all day. Then I remembered she`s imaginary. So I`m good.

Fun Prank: Put $1000 in an envelope and mail it to me.

Mix it up a little. Text a random phone number the following msg: "The fat one won`t fit into the woodchipper. What do you want me to do?"