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When I hear a person say "My Mom didn`t raise no dummy", I feel like saying "She lied to you"
A Smart car Zoomed past me And vanished into a pothole.
This empty wallet looks like I`ll be laughing obnoxiously at some guy`s awful jokes in a bar tonight.
If anyone could do it, it wouldn`t be called PROcrastination.
i just caught a disease so rare that even i dont have it .
Some people think I say inappropriate things...I perfer to think of it as being f*cking honest.
Textaphrenia – thinking you’ve heard or felt a new text message vibration when there is no message.
Anyone notice the irony behind “hyphenated” and “non-hyphenated”?
I`m not antisocial. I`m pro leave-me-the-hell-alone.
Would you like to save money on your car insurance? Walk ... Just sayin
That awkward moment when you sing the wrong part of a song with confidence.
At any given time my wallet is worth more than its contents.
I may be evil, crazy, insane and f*cking naughty but I do have some good traits, I just don`t dwell on them.
I`m having an out of money experience.
Did you know that if we laid all the facebook account owners end to end around the world. Three quarters of them would Drown? Hmm ....