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Remember years ago when we didn`t have facebook and we had to take pictures of our food and get the film developed at the chemist get all your friends round your house and show them what you have been eating ...the good old days
You left a note on the fridge saying "This isn`t working. Goodbye" but I opened it and it was working perfectly well. I don`t get it.
Apparently "I`ll break your god damn legs" isn`t the problem solving skills that employers are looking for, at least according to HR anyway.
There is really no way of knowing how many chameleons are in the room right now.
My smoke detectors are always cheering me on for being such a great cook.
I got in touch with my feminine side today... I made myself a sandwich.
"Go left at the chopsticks in the road" - Chinese directions
Is it just me that finds it disturbing that you can accidentally make a baby but you can`t accidentally make a pizza?
YouTube is so addicting, I click on a music video and next thing you know I`m watching how to make ice cream.
I was asked what I would give the woman who has everything... Well, my phone number for a start.
If I had a dollar for every time I had a nickel.......
A model citizen is just like a regular citizen that doesn`t eat.
I dont think I could ever stab someone.. I barely can get the straw into a Capri Sun.
If I had a penny for everytime I heard you bitch at me I`d have enough money to invest in a hitman
"Oh!Look The Smurfs Grew Up!"Grandma those are Avatars." -_-