Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I have a confession to make. I was born with a rare disease called “Amazing.”
I`m not upset because it`s Monday, I`m upset because I have to wear pants
My hatred for Nicki Minaj probably stems from my fear of clowns.
I have an oven with a "stop time" button. It´s probably meant to be "stop timer" but I don´t touch it, just in case.
Its real cute how pedestrians confuse “right of way” with immortality.
There’s nothing better than when someone you know walks by without recognizing you.
Dear who ever’s reading this, I could be naked right now and you would never know.
pumpkin for sale, slightly used
The best black Friday deal ... sleep - $0.
Breaking news: Newt saw his shadow. Six more weeks of campaigning and attack ads.
How old do I have to be when I can start pulling in front of cars without looking?
If I was famous I would just knock on peoples doors and be like ... Hello, yes it`s me.
Home alone… Time to teach the neighbors what good music sounds like!
Next time I`m on an elevator with four or more strangers, I`m going to turn around and say, "I`m sure you`re wondering why I`ve gathered you all here."
The cashier at this self checkout is horrible.