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When we catch the people who kill elephants & rhinos, can we pull all their teeth first?
There are many different ways one can save energy, but my favorite by far is this recliner.
I hide from people too, so I get it bigfoot, I get it.
It will be light. It will be dark. It will be light. It will be dark. It will be light. Then I`m back. Me, explaining a vacation to my cat.
Now that I`m turning 40, I need to be careful about what I eat and drink and make sure I am getting my nutrients. That is why I just added pulp-free Orange Juice to my Vodka.
Flies only live for 24 hours.. Except for the ones that get in your room. Those bastards live forever.
Never mistake my silence for weakness. No one plans a murder out loud.
After four karate lessons, I can now break a two-inch board with my cast
I`d be so much more successful if some of my ancestors had just married better.
I never run with scissors. (those last two words were unnecessary.)
How strict is the "I licked it, it`s mine" policy? There`s some things I`ve licked that I don`t want.
Apparently, saying “Wow, you’ve grown since I last saw you” isn’t deemed socially acceptable when said to adults.
I use these ( ... ) a lot. For which, I believe, the technical term is Dotty Dot Dots.
"I" before "E" except after "Old MacDonald had a farm"
These Jehovah`s Witnesses are getting creative. They are now knocking on my door dressed as cops saying they have a warrant.