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Great idea for an April Fools Prank ... Hide all of the desktop icons on someone`s computer and replace their wallpaper with a screenshot of their old desktop.
Whoever determined that a 1-inch candy bar should be called "fun sized" should really re-evaluate their standards for entertainment.
I can`t face my checkbook so I check my Facebook.
White girls be like: I`ll have one triple mocha dark chocolate ugg boot raspberry white iphone 5 double caramel infinity sign frappe please.
I wish there was an observation deck at WalMart.
I bet the guy who invented fake dog poo was upset the name "shampoo" was taken
I`m working out my budget and, provided I don`t live past Tuesday, I can retire relatively comfortably!!!
Sometimes at the gym I`ll struggle and make all kinds of awkward grunting sounds, but eventually I`ll get my shorts on.
Some Facebook friends are like ghost you dont see them but you know their there
My house was clean yesterday, sorry you missed it.
When I was a kid... No wait. I still do that.
I`m opening a bar called The Office. You`re welcome guys. "Be home soon sweetie, I`m at The Office"
I never mix business with pleasure, ......unless i call an escort.
And I was like “No, Coke is NOT ok. I wanted a Pepsi.” And she was all “Sir, 911 should only be dialed for real emergencies.”
Ok ... I just had a talk with myself, and it did not go well. Now I`m grounded.