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Men look at boobs for the same reason women look at puppies in cages. We just want to set them free and play with them.
I can think of absolutely no acceptable situation where a grown man should be taking a bathroom mirror selfie.
I usually don`t argue with the doctor but I don`t think "Batshit Crazy" is a legitimate medical term.
The closest I got to a 4.0 at university… was my blood alcohol level!
So far my Christmas shopping has involved buying myself presents, so I’d say it’s been a success.
My life has a great cast, but I can’t figure out the plot.
I am the undefeated champion of this”smooshing-down-the-garbage-so-I-don’t-have-to-take-it-out-for-another-day” game.
You guys, how can true love still exist if we don`t have mixed tapes anymore?
Your shadow: What happens when light travels 93 million miles unobstructed, only to be deprived of reaching the ground in the final few feet by you.
Installing home security cameras seemed like a great idea but explaining my dance offs with the dog was something I should`ve considered.
If Crunch Berries aren`t considered fresh fruit I don`t think this diet is going to work out.
My level of sarcasm has reached a dangerous level where even I don`t know if I`m kidding or not.
Facebook, the lost and found for people. . .
He who laughs first, must be connected to wi-fi.
There is no time to check time