Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Anyone who believes that children are our future has not been to a mall recently.
I’m gonna make this girl mine….. Right click, Save As….
Have some fun: goto the local bar. Play every Justin Beaber song and leave.
I didn’t sign up for the 401k at work, because there’s no way I can run that far.
It’s amazing how little information I need on someone before I decide I don’t like them.
It`s almost Valentines Day and I still don`t know what to get myself yet.
I couldn`t help but notice that I would like to have sex with you more frequently!
Drunk people are the only honest ones left.
I don`t know why people say life is short....this seems to be taking forever.
There`s 3 ways to get something done: 1. Do it yourself, 2. Hire someone or 3. Forbid your kids to do it.
never tell a lie...unless it is true
The only correct answer to the question are you sleeping is no.
Never ask a woman who is eating ice cream straight from the carton how she’s doing.
Who ever invented the knock knock joke should get the no bell prize.
Hey ladies breastfeeding in public, why don`t you ever smile in my pictures?