Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Have you ever wondered what a job application at Hooters is like? Maybe they just give you a bra and say, “here, fill this out”.
Sometimes I feel like giving up...Then I remember I have a lot of motherf*ckers to prove wrong
500 + friends... and not one of you saw where I put the remote?
I just awesomed all over the place.
Sorry for illegally downloading your music, guy who mostly makes songs about doing crime.
If a coworker asks to borrow your pen - sniff it and say, “I think this one is safe” and see if they’ll take it from your hand.
I’ve never pretended to be anything I’m not…except for sober. I’ve pretended to be sober a few times.
The most effective way to torture young people is to make them watch old people use a computer.
My mother said, “You won’t amount to anything because you procrastinate.” I said, “Oh ya…..Just you wait.....”
I bet all the cool math nerds call each other algebros.
I`m not lazy... I`m in energy saving mode.
I don`t have a drinking problem........I just celebrate everything!!! Like the fact that I have pants on, I`ll be celebrating that tonight.
gua suka sama kamu
Who ever says "words can`t hurt you" has never been hit in the face with a dictionary.
is ready to have one too many!