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I just noticed me saying "LOL" everytime I`m laughing = facebook addict...lmao :)
When girls have a great night out, they talk about it for months. When guys have a great night out, that night will never be spoken of.
Its a shame I don`t have 5 incomes to go with my 5 personalities.. Damn free loaders
I like you as a friend. Well, more like as a friend of a friend.
I really think that Caller ID needs to be more detailed. It should say things like "Wants help moving" or "Will whine about bad relationship."
My earthquake kit is just a tuxedo, because in case of a disaster, I want to look like the most important person to save.
sorry abaut the message I sent you last night, my phone was drunk!
I’m glad we don’t have to hunt for our food any more. I don’t even know where sandwiches live...
I need a job that pays at least 10,000 dollars an hour.
A word to the wise ain`t necessary - it`s the stupid ones that need the advice.
If you can`t handle me at my worst, then that sucks because that`s all there is to me.
We all just sat there and watched as Pepe Le Pew tried to rape that cat. Shame on us.
Our parents did the same sh!t too, they`re just liars.
Sometimes I drive between lanes and pretend my car is Pacman gobbling up the dashed lines.
I don’t think my inner child is ever moving out.