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I hit a new low today and used a cheat code on Wii Fit
Thought I had $707 in my bank account, turns out it was "LOL" and I was holding my statement upside down.
One good thing about having kids is that they are sick every time I get invited to something I don`t want to do.
I believe in love at first episode.
I started seeing this girl recently. She sometimes texts. Sometimes Whatsapps. Sometimes she emails. Sometimes she Facebooks. Im getting mixed messages.
that moment when somebody calls your house phone and ask where you are
I need a Shazam app for people I`m supposed to recognize but can`t remember
I`m as conflicted as a strip club addict with a glitter allergy.
I went for a run but came back home after 2 minutes because I forgot something. I forgot that I`m fat and can`t run for more than 2 minutes.
Well I made it through the day without beating anyone with a chair. I`d say my people skills are improving.
When reality kicks in… add more booze.
I was trying to think of something really deep to post on Facebook this morning. The Mariana Trench comes to mind.
Of course China is dominating the olympics, they probably made all of the equipment.
Facebook is great, but I still miss the good old days of writing down my random thoughts and sliding them into stranger`s pockets.
Filling out a job application. Under "Military Experience" I put that I once went commando for 4 days in a row.