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This is just a quick shout-out to bread bowls, waffle cones and other edible containers. You guys are doing a great job.
I don`t hate you, but if you we`re drowning, I would dive in and handcuff a piano to your neck.
If someone says you used too much butter or cheese on something, stop talking to them. You don`t need that kind of negativity
Do you ever get the feeling that you`re being watched? Because if it`s bothering you, I`ll stop.
finally joined craigs list. who wants to see my junk?
I just walked by an old man who kept saying, “One, three, five, seven, nine… one, three, five, seven, nine…” I thought, “How odd.”
I was going to exercise this morning, but then all the sprinkles would fall off my cupcake.
National no bra day wasn`t as successful as the creators had hoped. due to sagging attendants and lack of support.
We all make mistakes .... I just do it better than everyone else.
If anyone ever tells you your dreams are silly, remember there’s some millionaire walking around who invented the Pool Noodle.
Slowly, Waldo`s wife and Mr. Sandiego started putting the pieces together
What I lack in vocabulary, I make up for in…you know...stuff...and...things...
At least I know it wasn`t just me that was wondering if the cashier was a man or a woman. I just wish that my 5 year old didn`t ask.
If you heard twenty minutes of moaning from my bedroom that was just me trying to stand up.
During the holidays people have to make a choice between enjoying the holidays or spending it with the relatives.