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HardCoreStrategy 22 hours ago 6 3? Guys are? in a cafe. The first guy says "I?? have the smallest arm in the? world." The second guy says I have the?? smallest head in? the world." The third guy says I have the smallest d^ck in the world. They all? go to? the Guinness Book of World records. The? first? guy comes back and says I really? have the smallest arm in the world. The seconds guy? returns and? says? I have the smallest head in the world. The third guy comes back? and angrily?? says WHO? T
The more neighbors I spy on through my binoculars, the creepier I think all my neighbors are!
People are always much more interesting before you get to know them.
I`m not a father, but I have been called "daddy" a few times.
High-five a veteran today.
There may be two sides to every story, but you’re still a douche in both of them.
Success, like a fart, only bothers people when its not their own.
There is 2 address we will always know by heart, 1: Our Own, and 2: P. Sherman 42 wallyby way Sydney!
If I ever post something on Social media sites that`s not funny or clever, That just means someone hacked my account, Just Saying!
I would really like to help you move your furniture tomorrow, but I’m going to be too busy sitting on mine.
I wish I could forget you as easy as I forget my passwords.
In theory, sex should be grosser than letting someone borrow your toothbrush, but it`s not.
Trying to untwist a twizzler is a real b*tch and this gas station cashier yelling at me isn`t helping.
Greeting all the Single People a very Happy Independence Day!!
Don`t sweat the petty things and don`t pet the sweaty things.