Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Welcome back to plastic surgery anonymous. Nice to see so many new faces here today.
Whenever I open my fridge, my dog looks at me with a puzzled look and he thinks: Why don’t you eat all the food?
Autocorrect is a great feature, but it can also be your worst enema.
I leave notes on people’s windshields telling them I smashed their car and did an amazing job fixing it.
OMG! A CUSTOMER ALMOST DIED IN FRONT OF ME TODAY!! But then I counted to 10 and put the scissors back in the drawer. She never even knew.
If I weren´t such an alcoholic I would throw my drink in your face
People who make really bad decisions are always like "I have the worst luck"
If people in horror movies listened to me, they would still be alive.
The Patriots defensive coverage was almost as bad as the coverage by Obamacare.
An apple a day will keep anyone away ... if thrown hard enough.
I dig, she digs, he digs, they dig, we dig. its not a good poem but its really deep.
Why does no one ever talk about where a bear pees?
This might be the worst online counseling site ever.
Will someone please tell ugly girls with small boobs that their opioion doesnt really matter.
I`m going to hire two private detectives to follow each other .