Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
People who can finish a shampoo bottle at the same time as their conditioner are truly ninja`s.
Most of being an adult is marveling at the date and saying how fast the year is going by.
I`m old enough to remember when cell phones actually got smaller every year.
I try to get in at least 30 minutes of talking about exercise every day.
Taking selfies is a lot of work when you’re not attractive.
Care less and you’ll stress less.
Light travels faster than sound. That`s why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
When I think of a SELFIE, I`m not sure it`s the same thing you`re thinking of...
When my kids grow up, I’m going to their house to break their stuff, eat all their food, make a huge mess, say I’m bored & then just leave!
I`m tough and can take whatever life throws at me ... Especially if its dipped in chocolate first.
How does anything EVER get done at the bubble wrap factory??
Sure thing.... follow me... I`ll show you the fastest way to get to nowhere.
My dream job would be the Karma delivery service.
My blood hound was just attacked by a Crip hound.
This getting older thing really sucks. These days my eyes are so bad I have to buy the Large Print edition of Alphabet Soup.