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From 8am until 12pm, my job basically pays me to think about what I am going to have for lunch.
I thought I was a bit hardcore until I saw this guy sucking on a soy sauce packet like an Otter Pop.
I just let my mind wander, but it didn’t come back yet.
This earthquake was the first time that I`ve ever said, "it was 4.7, but felt bigger."
Of course I`m using OJ as a mixer, it`s flu season.
Don`t let the propeller hat fool you... I have no idea how to fly this plane.
A tattoo doesn’t tell you very much about a person, but where they put the tattoo does.
Not now, I`m busy bringing shame to my family on the internet.
If there is a wrong place and a wrong time, I’ll be there.
Sometimes I think I’m too picky. Then I watch my dog look for a place to poop.
I can`t help but smile when I see a woman wearing a Supertramp Concert t-shirt
Sometimes the most spiritual thing you can do is go to bed.
Getting told I can`t do something gives me all the motivation I need to get things done.
Yes, my attitude could stand some improvement but my insurance does not cover those medications.
Fast food places should have a third window, where you can trade in the wrong stuff they gave you at the second window.