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wonders how you can knock sense into someone when you`re beating them senseless?
If someday we all go to prison for downloading Movies and TV shows, I just hope they split us up by genre.
wondering if today is a good day to implement my plan...
Life lesson: you never have to feel ashamed of anything you buy as long as you buy a birthday card at the same time
So another day has come and gone and I still haven`t used algebra.
I know you think you´re interesting because you have an accent. But a drunken slur is not an accent.
In today`s world, the key to success is to delete your Whatsapp account!
Stop complaining about the rain. Cause rain makes corn and corn makes whiskey.
Some people just need a high-five. In the face. With a chair. Made of steel. Twice. From Hulk. On adrenaline rush.
I’m home alone. Time to start my concert.
I don’t need pepper spray to stop a mugger, I just open my wallet and blow the dust in their eyes.
I`m the type of person who will throw away the manual and ponder for 3 hours "where the hell do I start"
Whenever I receive a text saying bahaha, I like to believe you are a sheep on drugs.
Now that 1 in every 3 people cheats in their relationships,I`m left wondering. . .Is it my wife or my girlfriend that`s cheating?
Doing donuts in the parking lot sounds fun. Eating donuts in the parking lot sounds better.