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I love the people in parking lots with "free kittens" signs because I too feel that kittens shouldn`t be oppressed.
I accidentally ran over my neighbour`s cat........... Nine times....... just in case
It`s ok computer, I go to sleep after 20 minutes of inactivity too.
Zoos would be cooler if you had to fight each animal before you could see the next one.
Happy "Another excuse to drink" Day!
Mondays are middle finger approved
That awkward moment when you leave a store without buying anything and all you can think is “act natural, you’re innocent”.
Always believe a woman when she says, "you don`t really wanna know"
If you think my status updates are ridiculous you should see my life choices
no..i am not drunk, floors needs hugs too ! :p
I came home one day all proud as can be with my report card and said to my Mom ,Look I got a B in reading , She said that`s a D you moron !
I don’t have a problem with friends who ask to borrow money. I love a good laugh as much as the next guy.
I`m perfect you adjust.
You know you are getting old when a bunch of annoying teenagers get murdered in a horror movie and you relate more with the killer.
People who say they suffer from constipation are usually full of sh!t.