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All guys should learn from Mario Bros. No matter how far their princess is, they should go after her.
is in no shape to exercise
I would call my fashion style: “clothes that still fit.”
Someday we’ll look back on all this and pretend not to remember it.
People assume when I yawn that I’ve lost interest in what they have to say but truth be told, I was never interested.
I just ended a 5 year relationship. Luckily it wasn`t mine.
Do you ever wish you had a second chance to meet someone again for the first time?
I hate it when I think I`m buying organic vegetables and I get home to discover they`re just regular doughnuts.
My friends says that I spend too much time talking to random people online. What do you guys think?
The filling in this fortune cookie tastes like paper...
I don`t care what the expiration date says, I have to smell it
If I had a time machine, I`d just keep going back every 8-9 hours so I could sleep more.
According to the 19 citations I got for trespassing and peeping, “neighborhood watch” isn’t what I thought it was.
It`s always the rednecks that know all the inner most conspiracies of the government.